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They laugh and cheer as Jawaher scans the deserted streets and drives on. One man videotaped me from his car. Another time a woman who was completely veiled gave me the thumbs up. He tells another story of a female friend who once rode a bicycle to a restaurant. All are in their early 20s. Jawaher wears her headscarf loose, and both she and her friend Dania leave their faces uncovered. The two women wear sheer black chiffon abayas lined with boldly patterned silk.

The men wear traditional dress or jeans and T-shirts. Jawaher and her friends belong to what will be a defining generation for Saudi Arabia. It is a generation that finds itself pulled between a world experienced through the internet, satellite TV and mobile communications, and real life in what remains a deeply traditional and conservative society. There are those who seek refuge in faith and tradition, and others who attempt to explore where faith ends and tradition begins in an effort to strike their own balance with modernity.

Can these leaders understand the young generation, their hopes, dreams and aspirations?

There are steps forward but at the same time there are steps back. Many of his peers are grappling with what it means to be Saudi. Nader cannot seem to tell whether he is kidding. No, he is not coming. It is not a good idea. Back in the Village. Enad says his way of thinking was forged in the village of Najkh, miles west of Riyadh, where he lived until he was 14 with his grandfather.


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  4. It is where he still feels most comfortable. There is a walled-in yard of sand with piles of wood used to heat the house in the cold desert winters. In the desert outside of the Saudi Arabian capital, Riyadh, two young men debate the notion of romantic love in their nation. Inside there is no furniture, just a few cushions on the floor and a prayer rug pointing in the direction of Mecca.


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    Enad is quiet and hides his cigarettes when his grandfather comes through. He would never tell his father or grandfather that he smokes. Enad remains stone-faced when a cousin mentions that another of his cousins, a woman named Al Atti, 22, is interested in him. The topic came up because another cousin, Raed, had asked Al Atti to marry him, and she refused. The conflict and flirtation touched on so many issues — manhood, love, family relations — that it sparked a flurry of whispering, and even Enad was drawn in.

    Al Atti had let her sisters know that she liked Enad, but made it clear that she could never admit that publicly. So she asked a sister to spread the word from cousin to cousin, and ultimately to Enad. Word finally reached Enad, who tried to stay cool but was clearly interested, and flattered. At that point Enad was himself whispering about Al Atti, trying to figure out a way to communicate with her without actually talking to her himself.

    He asked a female visitor to arrange a call, and then pass along a message of interest. Enad said it was never his idea to pursue her, but that a man — a real man — could not reject a woman who wanted him. A Question of Romance. It was a short visit, two days in the village, and then Enad was back to Riyadh for work.

    How Do Dating Apps Work in Places Where Dating is Less Than Legal?

    That weekend, he and Nader went out to the desert, just outside of Riyadh, where young men go to drive Jeeps in the sand and to relax, free from the oversight of the religious police and neighbors. They sat beside each other on a blanket. What Nader meant was that Saudi traditions do not allow for romance between young, unmarried couples.

    There are many stories of young men and women secretly dating, falling in love, but being unable to tell their parents because they could never explain how they knew each other in the first place. One young couple said that after two years of secret dating they hired a matchmaker to arrange a phony introduction so their parents would think that was how they had met. How is there no romance? You want to meet a woman on the street so you can be romantic?

    Nader was intimidated, and frightened. Enad did not relent, berating his cousin. Then he folded. Tell us what you think. Please upgrade your browser. See next articles. Newsletter Sign Up Continue reading the main story Please verify you're not a robot by clicking the box.

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